“I deserve it” is a RED FLAG.
When you get to the end of your day.
When you get seated in that restaurant booth.
When you uncork the pinot — watch out for what drove you there?
Do you “Deserve it”
Or
Did you Plan it.
If you have the attitude that you deserve something, you’re likely coming from a short-term reward, toddler brain, graspy kind of place and that is not the attitude that gets the weight off or keeps it off.
What is funny though – what may feel sticky – is that you’re right.
You do deserve it.
You deserved to be cared for. Special. Treated.
You’re awesome. You do hard things. You are the leader of your life, your family, your job, the calendar… Pretty much everything, right?
So yes – do care for you – because you are the best person for the job. But tell me this.
Is short-term reward more caring than long term gain?
Does the quick fix beat out the big finish?
Consider this:
Wine tonight equals what tomorrow?
The drive through after work makes you feel like what in an hour?
Saying eff-it to your planned leftovers and getting a pizza says what to your brain about your word to yourself?
All of those things are good – I get it. They are quick, easy, tasty in the moment – but in the long run they take you out of the game you are playing with yourself.
If you want to play to win then consider this your invitation to the big game my friend.
You don’t win the superbowl by losing most of the games in the preseason.
You don’t graduate high school without at least showing up for class.
You don’t get to lose the weight if you quit on yourself every day — you just get better at quitting on you.
You are worth the discomfort of the long term win.
Here is what I want you to do right now.
Get out a pen and some paper. Look at your calendar. Think about what is in your fridge. Plan your food and your day for tomorrow.
Plan for reality.
Then tomorrow, do what you said you’d do.
At first you’re not doing this to lose weight. You’ll get there, but, at first you’re taking step number one in healing your relationship to you.
Think about how many friends you have that never show up when you make plans. Who drive through the drive through on their way out to dinner with you because it was closer, faster, cheaper, and easier.
I hope none!
So, don’t do to yourself what you wouldn’t stand for in a friendship.
You deserve that much.
To recap – Watch out for those sneaking words that “you deserve it” that are just code for “I’m going to go throw myself under the bus.”
Those will kill your progress, steal your dreams, and walk all over your spirit.
Be the woman who plays the long game.
Walk by the cookie and say “Not today, I’ve got bigger things going on.”
Check out the latest episodes of my Podcast: Stop Weighting and End the Struggle with Food, Weight, and Your Body!